I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
We're too hungover to prance.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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