Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
