something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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