Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
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