Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
