the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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