just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
