I think scott just propositioned me for sex
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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