We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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