its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
