Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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