Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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