Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
