I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i drank out of a bidet.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
