Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
