Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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