That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
