omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
