i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
