Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
