I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
there was a trapeze. enough said
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
