Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
