just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
