You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
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