holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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