dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
