Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
