My nipple is on Facebook.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
