So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
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