There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
My feet surprised me
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