You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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