You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
