we have officially lost it.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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