Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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