His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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