Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
