Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
