Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Randomize
