...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
