she looked like the bat from fern gully.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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