so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
operation harelip BJ is a go
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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