I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize