We won't sleep together?
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
