I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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