So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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