Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
