Everything about him screamed your future.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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