I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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