your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
