So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
