she was so not down for the gang bang
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
